Rocks in a Slug Place

6 Mar

This week’s cartoons feature a nice little mix of absolutely everything.  Okay, maybe not everything, but enough stuff to wrap your head around (at least while reading this blog post).  And as the title suggest, you’ll be seeing some rocks and slugs.

So, let’s get to it!

I recently just cleaned out my glove compartment.  I couldn’t believe the array of garbage that was sitting around in there.bod150228  There was probably more found in there than discoveries from when they unearthed King Tut.

I spotted everything from old insurance information from 2008 to coupons for Burger King that expired half a decade ago (and a disfigured corpse of an old Whopper wrapper).

Luckily, I took the time to clean it out.  Now, there is nothing in there.  Lame, I know.

Thinking about it, I don’t think I’ve ever actually used the thing to store a glove.  Has anyone actually stored gloves in there?  Seems like the center console is the best place for them.  Or the passenger side floor.

Now, on to pigs.

bod150301One thing in my life I’m trying to weed out is meat.

Listen, I think the stuff is pretty bad for you.  And as a guy that grew up around farms in Ohio and Kansas, all I can tell you is those farm animals DO NOT have it good.  Supporting that industry isn’t exactly appealing to me.  For my health and conscience.

No, I will never get on here and preach to you about how you shouldn’t eat meat, but again, personally I’d like to get rid of the stuff.

Believe it or not, I’m kind of close (to giving it all up).  I’m mostly down to just fish and chicken.  Yeah, chicken is meat and fish is too (although, it’s not considered that, for some reason).  But, I’ve been avoiding the cows and pigs and much as possible.  I’ll still eat the occasional steak and chew on bacon, but it’s limited.

One step at a time.  bod150302

Now if I could just give up donuts….

Moving on.

I have a cat, but I’m also a dog person.

My mom’s dog, Ursa, will do anything to get a piece of food from my plate.IMG_0175

Above:  Ursa eating a chicken nugget on the couch.

She’s tried begging, pleading, sitting, speaking and just about everything.  It’s funny that she keeps doing all that because – in the end – I always tend to give her something regardless.  She could just chill out and relax.  Oh well.  I guess she doesn’t realize that.

Do slugs have any romance?bod150303

Well, according to this particular cartoon – yes.  Yes they do.

I guess if I were a slug and was trying to be flirtatious, I’d have a hard time keeping my eyes from wandering.  Then again, they don’t really have a choice when you’re a slug.

Now from slugs to fire drills.

When I used to work in office buildings during many of my numerous day jobs (yeachh!) I used to have, there would be that occasional fire drill.  We’d have to calmly exit the building and go stand in the parking lot.bod150304

I never understood fire drills.  If there was a REAL fire, trust me – I would not be calmly walking out, and I don’t think I’m alone.

Depending where the fire were to occur kind of makes the fire drill impractical.  I mean, if the fire started at the exit that was used in the drill, it wouldn’t be possible to exit that way.  So, why have a drill?

Okay, I’m going on too much about fire drills.  At any rate, I found them kind of lame.

Tornado drills though – now we’re talking!  Whoo-hoo!bod150305

I was doing some client work many weeks ago, and this idea about a flower pot and raising a family came up.  The client didn’t want to use the idea for their own purposes, so when that happens, I switch it up a bit and usually make a cartoon out of it anyway.  After all, is there such thing as a bad idea?  (The answer is yes.  A resounding yes.  Just look at this blog.)

And the last cartoon of the week is about stocks.bod150306

This idea about the rock market (horrible pun, I know) was one of those I almost scrapped.  Definitely my least favorite comic of the week, but hey, maybe you enjoy it.  Well, do you?

So, that wraps up this past week of cartoons!

If you haven’t subscribed to my email list yet, you’re missing the daily action.  You can do that HERE.

See ya!

 

 

 

Whales, sharks and medication. Oh my!

27 Feb

Don’t let the title fool you.  This is really a week-in-review of cartoons.  However, I thought I’d change the format a bit for this from here on out. Instead of just posting them down the middle and dating the cartoons (like I’ve been doing), I thought I’d actually just write around each one – kind of ranting and explaining things as I go along.  Cool?  Probably not, but oh well.  Let’s try it. When I was a kid, my family and I all went whale watching out in Cape Cod (I believe that’s where it was).  I recall these huge whales swimming around and for the life of me I couldn’t understand how they didn’t bod150221end up hitting the boats.  I envisioned us getting trampled by a whale (yes, I know – trampled is probably not the right word). So, I’m guessing subconsciously, it made me create the cartoon about a whale mentioning a dropped anchor.  After all, I’m sure a few anchors have been dropped on whales heads sometime throughout history.  Too bad they don’t have Aspirin down there in the depths of the ocean. And speaking of ocean dwellers, another cartoon this past week featured one of my go-to favorite premises – sharks!bod150222 I doubt sharks have any dinner habits besides a feeding frenzy, but hey, they might enjoy a nice sit-down meal (if that were physically possible for them). I love creating shark cartoons for quite a few reasons. One is, there seems to be an endless supply of gags for them (at least for me).  You want to see proof?  Well, I’ve got quite a few to check out.  You can see that HERE. The other reason is simple:  I like sharks. When I lived in Florida, I would swim waaaaay out off the coast trying to find one.  Stupid?  Yes.  Extremely stupid.  Even with all the stupidity of swimming way out trying to spot a shark, I never did.  Not in the wild.  Probably a good thing or I might be typing this without an arm right now. I never got a fortune cookie that mentioned seeing a shark was in my future.bod150223 I’ve never been a medication type of person.  I could probably use some from time to time for anxiety, headaches and to just relax, but I don’t take anything.  I probably never will.  I just think that might mess up my cartooning career.  bod150224Seriously. Not to brag (because it’s not easy) but my mind wanders in places probably most peoples minds don’t.  I believe that’s how I come up with ideas for cartoons and really off-the-wall stuff.  If I took any type of medication, I’ve always been paranoid that would ruin things. And honestly, I think I’m in good shape.  I have different moods like any normal human; whether that be anxiety, upset, happy or sarcastic (wait…is sarcastic a mood?).  And I’ve known some people that use meds as a crutch.  Basically, I’m pretty sure I really don’t need any type of medication anyway.  (Don’t tell my psychiatrist that.) That being said, if you’re on medication and it starts kicking in doors, you may want to consider weening yourself off the stuff. Here’s a known fact:  I am not musically inclined.  bod150225 I can sort of play the piano – but that’s it. I wish I could play guitar and other music.   After all, I LOVE music.  I’ve written before about my love for bands like The Doors and composers like Mozart.  But, my musical capabilities are worse than a five-year-old. Since I don’t play guitar, I’m not too familiar with guitar picks.  But that doesn’t stop me from featuring them in a cartoon. Do psychics use apps now? If I had to guess, the psychic industry has taken a hit since most fortune telling can be done online.  I haven’t looked, but I’m also guessing there are a few apps out there for telling the future.  So, this particular cartoon featuring the fortune teller might not be a huge stretch.  And as for the sucker paying to go see her?  Yeah, that’s not a stretch either.bod150226 The last comic of the week is about the insane. My mother worked in a mental ward for quite awhile as a nurse. When I was growing up, I was always curious if they actually bod150227had straight jackets and padded rooms in her ward.  Come to think of it, I never asked.  At any rate, there could be some romance blossoming in some hospital somewhere.  Especially when two psyche patients are committed. Now, these two?  Yeah, they could probably use some medication. ——————————————————————————————————————————- Be sure to swing back around here next week for another week-in-review.  And read the daily comics HERE, Technically Speaking HERE and license over 1,000 of my cartoons HERE. Okay, that’s all, folks!

Cartoons 2-14 to 2-20

20 Feb

It’s been quite a busy week. I’ve had a few new clients I’ve worked with developing – what else – cartoons! I’m also working on launching a home base website, so to speak. It’s been in development (this website) for months now with an awesome marketing company. Anyway, while all the behind-the-scene work is being done, I’m thinking of new ways to make it the BEST source for cartoons ever (not to sound cocky, but it will be). I’m planning on licensing my work to as many people, places and things as possible. So, I’ll keep you posted. Anyhow, a lot on my mind. But some good things in the works.

Well, you’re not here to hear all about me. Instead, let me get to the week-in-review of cartoons!

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2-14-15

Shadows have it rough. Always being stepped on and constantly being controlled by an individual. And to make matters worse, they get featured on a cartoon. Yikes!

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2-15-15

It’s so much fun giving inanimate objects a voice.

That’s the case with this premise and firecrackers.

I observe things quite closely and I find their (firecrackers) chain reactions interesting. I’m not special in this regard (I’m sure most people have observed things like firecrackers closely) but, like dominoes, once one goes the others follow.

That being said, I couldn’t imagine being an employee that actually builds these things. I don’t know if they’re made by hand or by a machine nowadays. At any rate, I wouldn’t want to work there. I’m guessing a few limbs would be lost, thus possibly devastating my cartooning career (gotta keep this right hand, you know).

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2-16-15

I mentioned this comic in my daily email (which if you haven’t subscribed yet you’re missing out) about how I had a turtle as a child and it was quite fast. I’d let him loose out on the lawn and man – he would take off. I’m guessing he would take off because he didn’t want to go back to his lousy cage (which I don’t blame him – I’d never keep a turtle as a pet now that I’m older and know better). Anyway, a turtle slow? Not from what I’ve seen.

Then again, I never had a pet rabbit to compare it to.

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2-17-15

I had this idea written down for WEEKS and didn’t know what to do with it. At first, I thought it would be funny to have them on a date (you know, this whole this is a take off of having an awkward silence). I opted for the “slightly more realistic version but not really” of two cats just sitting there looking back…purring.

I liked this one a lot. Probably my favorite of the week. Purr-fect (okay, that was a horrible pun).

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2-18-15

Ballroom dancing (in fact, dancing in general) has never appealed to me. So, naturally, I use dancing as a premise a lot of times. I tend to do that with things that don’t appeal too much to me (except cats, of course).

If I was to do this comic over, I’d probably have the female deer giving it to the male and he’d have a disgusted look on his face (like me). But, isn’t the male supposed to pull out all the stops for an anniversary present? So, I went with this version. It works. Either way, ballroom prancing sounds horrible.

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2-19-15

I am about to get stocked-up on all my Girl Scout cookies for the year. I think I have quite a few boxes on the way (honestly, I don’t know the total amount off the top of my head). I LOVE these cookies.

The sad part is, after switching my diet up, it’s going to be hard for me to eat them. But. luckily I allow my self a ‘Free Day’. I guess that means I’ll have to eat all the boxes on my ‘Free Day’ as well.

Goodbye size 34 jeans.

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2-20-15

I don’t know why I found this one so funny, but I did. I guess that’s why I write and draw this stuff.

Hey, that’s it! Until next week (or any other blogs and stuff in the meantime).

Cartoons 2-7 to 2-13

13 Feb

I’ve been posting these weekly ‘Week-In-Reviews’ now for several months without missing a beat. And I plan on continuing this tradition. However, I would like to hear your feedback as well. Anything else you would like to see here? What are your thoughts so far? How’s my hair? You know, general feedback stuff. So, after reading this, if you have a moment to leave a comment or shoot me an email, I’d love to hear. I’m always interested in what other people think of things I do. I know what I think, but I won’t bore you with my opinions.

Anyway, on with a look at this past week’s cartoons!

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2-7-15

I hesitated featuring Zorro as a reference in a cartoon. Does anyone these days know who Zorro is (if you’re not over 30)? Okay, well, I know who he is and I thought he’d make a great addition to the counselor’s couch. Wearing a black mask all day is bound to lead to some psychological issues down the road.

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2-8-15

At one point I was reading something that mentioned ‘slapstick comedy’ and this idea just popped in my head. That’s how most of these cartoons happen….

Anyway, hope the stick is okay. I suppose that type of comedy goes way back to its roots.

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2-9-15

What made me write this was I learned that when a cat is declawed, it’s the equivalent to your hand losing all of its fingers (yikes!). As far as I’m concerned, cat’s shouldn’t be declawed. Seems a bit cruel. My cat Tiger doesn’t have her claws (we rescued her when she was four and was already missing them). I think she’s a bit bitter about it to this day. I’m sure there are many times she’d love to take a swipe at my hand for not feeding her directly on time.

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2-10-15

This was probably my favorite one of the week but I’m not sure how well it came across to everyone else. I just envisioned this happening in real life. I feel like it kind of has. You ever have a sales rep or someone tell you to be sure and rate them five-stars while you’re face-to-face? I have. It’s not very comfortable. I’ll usually give them five-stars though for the effort.

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2-11-15

Back to cats…..

Yes, this would be a museum full of temptation for any feline. I know for me personally, when a sign says ‘Do Not Touch’ it makes me want to touch it more. Those signs are like a shiny red button that make them irresistible.

Sorry, Rembrandt, but that one painting of yours might have my finger print on it. (Okay, I didn’t REALLY touch a Rembrandt. Or did I? Hmm….)

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2-12-15

Speaking of temptation (no pun intended). It’s hard not to bark at stuff if your a dog.

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2-13-15

Those lousy free toothbrushes at the dentist office are worth the price, right? I mean, it seems like if ANYTHING they might throw in one of those automatic ones or one of the new handy-dandy top-o’-the-line brushers – but nope – you get just a regular, cheap toothbrush. At least at my dentist (and all the ones I’ve ever been to). Oh well. If I were really picky I’d ask for floss, too. But, I think that would set them back too much.

That’s about it for the week-in-review! Please leave any feedback or leftover pizza below.

I’ve Been At This Awhile

11 Feb

While rummaging through my closet trying to find old tax information, I ran across a folder containing old stories and things from elementary school. Since I can’t quite recall what kind of material I was writing back then I decided to read a few of them. After all, I had to see how I wrote back then. Just maybe – maybe – I’ve improved since back in the day.

Well, upon reading some of these, they’re hard to explain.

The material is a bit…weird?

Okay, I guess that would make sense. If you’ve ever read anything that I currently write or cartoons, you can see not much has changed.

So, never-before seen stories and poems are fun to feature, right? Here is a glimpse of my works from when I was – if I had to guess – in 3rd grade (at least this first story is because it says it on the paper).

This first one is called Blue Danube.

BLUE DANUBE

If I were a swan, I would swim to Africa. I would look to see what lions look like. After I was done, I would swim to China. I would look at bamboo sticks and panda bears. After all of that, I would go back to my home in South America. Then: Next year I would go to the north pole.

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I’m not too sure why there’s a Toledo Symphony Orchestra ribbon on this and don’t even get me started on what a Blue Danube is (I honestly have no clue), but hey, this is an award-winning story (I don’t care what the ribbon says – it’s a ribbon at least).

And just for the record, I do not currently live in South America.

Moving on…

The next story is a rather long one. I’ll write it out for you. It’s called The Horseshoe Shop. I hope you don’t lose any sleep over it.

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THE HORSESHOE SHOP

By Nate Fakes

In a town in Nevada, a man named Ben was at his job working on making horseshoes. He worked all day all the time. He rarely got company, and he usually got lonely. When he would go to bed, all he could hear in his mind was the clanging and hammering of his anvil.

One morning, when he got up, he was sick. He had spots on his arms and his eyes were very red. He didn’t know what was happening to him. He thought to himself, “Am I going to die?”

When he thought this he passed out. His heart stopped beating, and he died.

Later that week was his funeral. He had no family, so he was buried in a wooden charred up box. His horseshoe shop closed also. No one ever really knew him. All they knew of him were the sounds from his shop. No one would ever miss him.

That week after the funeral, a man walked by his grave. His tombstone was just a rock with his initials on it. “Poor soul,” the man said. “Never had a friend, a wife, a family or anything special. He was just alive, and now gone.” The man left, and Ben’s grave was left alone again.

Later that night, in the Roberson household, everyone had gone to bed.

“Goodnight, mom,” said the youngest one.

Everyone was asleep, but the littlest one couldn’t sleep. He then started to hear a noise. A noise like of a man beating on something steel with a hammer. The little boy then looked out his window. Through the trees, he could see Ben’s closed horseshoe shop. He adjusted his eyes, and saw a glowing light in the shop. He was still hearing the noise, too. “Someone must be vandalizing that old shop. I’d better get dad,” the little boy said to himself.

“Dad! Dad! Wake up! the little boy said.

“Huh? What is it?”

“Someone is at the old horseshoe shop.”

“Why do you say that? It’s boarded up!” the boy’s dad yelled.

The little boy took his dad to his window, and they both looked out.

“There’s nothing out there! It’s boarded up! Go back to bed!” the boy’s dad said.

“But dad, it was there! I’m not lying!” the boy cried. The boy’s dad sent him back to bed, and the boy fell asleep.

Later that night, the boy heard clanging noises again. He knew that it was coming from outside. His dad wouldn’t believe him if he told him again. Besides hearing the noise, he saw the glowing light. It was a faint green light, unlike a lantern. “I’m going to check this out for myself,” the boy said.

He got on his shoes and went outside, sneaking around trying not to make a sound. He started walking to the shop. “Click, clang, click, clang….” the sound was making. As he got closer, the noise got louder. The boy went up to the shack and looked in.

That next morning, the boy’s dad found him dead next to the shack. The boy’s eyes were wide and his mouth was open. They say he died of fright.

What happened in the shack? No one knows, but some say it was haunted and some say a racoon jumped out in front of the boy and scared him. What do you think?

The End

And finally, a short…poem?

I’m guessing this inspired The Horseshoe Shop. I’ll let you read this one on its actual paper. It’s legible.

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Anyhow, those are my stories.

I suppose these help explain a lot about my cartooning career in terms of off-the-wall material that I produce. It seems I’ve been going strong since, well, at least 3rd grade.

Sweating It Out

7 Feb

I know it’s so cliche to workout at the beginning of the year.  Well, I’m happy to say that I didn’t START working out at the beginning of this year (I’ve been doing that), however, I’ve really stepped it up in 2015.

As a cartoonist, my profession involves a lot of sitting.  And snacks.

It’s important that I don’t just sit around, eat and not do anything else.  I would definitely be the ‘Biggest Loser‘ if I did that.

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So, I’m happy to say I workout quite a bit.

I’m not here to brag about it.  It kind of drives me nuts when I’m on Facebook and I see people putting up selfies followed by, “At the gym….man, I’m strong!  Look a me!”.  Basically though, I wanted to share with you my mindset and how it changed a bit.

I used to do just the bare minimum workout.  A few chest exercises, biceps, triceps and about 20 minutes of cardio.  And this was about 3-4 times a week.  Never consistent, but I have been doing it this way for years.

I never really enjoyed it.  It seemed like a hard effort every time.  After all, I’m not trying to get buff or anything.  It was just something I felt I had to do.

I tried doing the whole waking up at 5:30 AM and getting it out of the way.  I realized that was torture and stopped doing it.  (In fact, I wrote about that several months ago about my daily routine.  When I wrote that, the early morning thing was happening.  Ugh.)

What I’ve realized is this:  If you’re miserable going to the gym, change the routine.

I love going to the gym now and am there about two hours a day.  I know not everyone has two hours a day, but honestly, if you give up maybe a few television shows, you could at least fit in an hour.  Or a half hour.  Hey, it’s up to you.  Don’t go at all if you don’t want.  Again, I’m just sharing my thoughts.  Anyway…

Here’s a few reasons why I love going now:

I joined an ACTUAL gym:  Before I was just going downstairs to the small one in my apartment complex.  There is some pretty good equipment at an actual gym and I can get a much better workout.  The piddly stuff downstairs didn’t cut it.  Plus, if ONE other person was working out, it was cramped and annoying.  It felt like you were walking over each other (which may have actually happened a few times).

I go with a friend:  Yes, that helps immensely.  You have someone push your workout and also, if your friend goes, you’re 10 x’s more likely to not come up with an excuse not to go.

It’s feels like getting out (and it is):  This applies to me since I’m in my studio all day.  Getting out and physically driving to the gym actually feels like a getaway now and not a chore.

I changed my workout time to evenings:  Remember me mentioning how miserable I was getting up at 5:30 AM?  I stopped fooling myself and realized I’m not a morning person.  Never have been and probably never will be.  Find a good time that works.  If you’re not happy with it, change it.  If you don’t have a flexible schedule, try to see if there’s anyway to adjust it.  I know it’s not always easy, but there are things you can do.

Anyway, I just wanted to share those little tidbits.

If you’re in a profession like me that requires sitting a lot – or not – I’d suggest going to a gym.  I’ve felt great the last month and it’s a great escape from the norm.  Plus, I’m guessing it’s healthy.

I’m not personal trainer or here to motivate you, but it’s been a good 2015 for getting in shape.  Somehow, I hope this all translates into a stellar 2015 for cartooning as well.

Don't Tread on Me Treadmill

Cartoons 1-31 to 2-6

6 Feb

I’ve had a wild time over the past few months juggling my new series, Technically Speaking, and my regular workflow of gag cartoons. But, surprisingly, they’re all going well (at least in my opinion).

Here is a look at this past week’s cartoons!

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1-31-15

I read somewhere that a cat typically gets about 18 hours of sleep a day. Somehow I don’t think my cat, Tiger, gets that much. For one, she’s always up first thing in the morning. And since I work from home, I’m constantly working around her. So, it’s hard for any cat to sleep with me listening to the radio at the drawing board and opening and shutting the fridge for stuff throughout the day.

At any rate, I’m sure her food consumption makes up for any lack of sleep. She has plenty of food….and eats it……all day. She’s gotta be a happy cat. I just hope she’s not sleep walking more than I think.

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2-1-15

I can’t stand calling tech support.

I haven’t had to in awhile, but sometimes – just sometimes – a computer issue will come along that I can’t figure out (even after watching YouTube videos on it) and I might have to call. Every time I do, I get off the phone feeling belittled, confused and like a moron.

I actually used to work tech support for awhile (long storry…I won’t get into it here) and I kind of get it. My only entertainment throughout the day was to try to act smart on the phone. I guess it made me feel better for working a lousy job. Plus, when we hung up, we’d all talk amongst ourselves and say things like, “Man, you should’ve heard this idiot I was talking to! Whew!”

So, I have a little bit of sympathy for the tech people on the phone, but still, as a consumer now and NOT the guy handling the calls, I guess I’d like to feel smarter when I call. Hopefully they change the procedure on their end soon so that they’re helpful and not like I was.

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2-2-15

If I run across a chef like this at a diner, I’m probably not going to complain – let alone send my food back. Luckily, a scene like this usually only occurs in gag cartoons – like mine.

This one took some Googling to learn how to draw a camel. Why? Well, honestly, I don’t think I’ve ever featured a camel in a comic up until this point. So, instead of going off my memory (which is usually wrong), I pulled up ‘camel’ on the search engine and found some pics.

We’ll see how long it will be before drawing another camel comic. I’m guessing by then, Google will be replaced with something else.

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2-3-15

Boy, when I used to use a PC, these buttons and myself were working together daily. Thank god I have a MacBook now. If I run into issues, I just take the battery out. Much more fun than hitting three buttons for a reset (and/or calling tech support).

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2-4-15

You don’t see many mimes anywhere anymore, do you? Actually, come to think of it, I can’t recall the last time I saw one in public. Oh well. They make a lot of appearances in cartoons so I guess they remain relevant. Too bad I usually make fun of them. But hey, they don’t speak up about it, so I continue on.

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2-5-15

I just about drew an actual river bank in this one; with an ATM and the whole shebang. But, I decided down the line that it didn’t work too well (since I don’t believe there is such a thing). This is what I call ‘going with my gut’ (which often is full of a donut or two).

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2-6-15

One thing that irritates me about Ryan Seacrest is that he seems to have perfect tone and pitch on EVERYTHING regarding speech. I have days where I can’t blurt out a sentence properly at all. So, maybe I’m bitter (no, I don’t want to be Ryan Seacrest) but how long does he practice talking?

Well, can’t blame a guy. He gets paid a lot more than a cartoonist, I’m sure.

Well, that’s it for the week in cartoons! I’m sure I’ll be posting again next week….and the week after that….and after that. Okay, you get the point. Until next time!

Cartoons 1-24 to 1-30

30 Jan

So, it’s been an interesting week of work. Quite the variety pack, if I say so myself. And as usual, this week brought forward my regular published cartoons. And with that said, here’s a look at the week-in-review of comics from 1-24 to 1-30.

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1-24-15

Any time I create ‘potty humor’ (as some might call it), it will sometimes get criticism for being immature. However, if featuring planets and potty humor, well, it gets a laugh (at least I hope)! This particular cartoon fared quite well with the audience. And I say that judging by shares on Facebook, comments on my syndicates site and general feedback.

I actually had to do a little research (which consisted of Googling) on what planets were gassy. Saturn was the winner. Being a neighboring planet must stink.

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1-25-15

This was probably my favorite of the week. Why? Well, I – like many – enjoy music. I can actually read music (badly) and play piano as well. This one in particular though just made for a good car-tune. (Did you catch that clever play-on-words? Yeah…they don’t pay me for nothing.)

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1-26-15

It’s funny because I started this cartoon off by drawing crescent rolls. After looking at the drawing though, it looked weird. Not that I can’t draw crescent rolls (I can – I swear!) but I could see how someone could mistake them for something else (like a dog toy or recalled boomerangs). They just didn’t seem clear.

So, in fear of nobody getting the joke, I made them cinnamon rolls. Easy visual, simple gag and gets the point across. And makes me hungry. Pretty sweet, huh?

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1-27-15

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I HATE math. I’m definitely not a numbers guy. But, for some reason, fairly regularly I have a few number cartoons in me that I can create regarding numbers. This one fared pretty well in the science/math fans of mine.

If I had to do this one over though, I’d probably have them eating pie. Might of added that extra little oomph.

bod150128

1-28-15

Don’t worry, Ketchup. Most special sauce is just Thousand Island dressing. I’d say you (ketchup) win in the popularity contest.

bod150129

1-29-15

Zombie cartoons are another frequent topic (at least every couple months or so). I guess it’s from being an avid fan of the show The Walking Dead.

I try not to over-do it though creating zombie material. After all, a lot of the jokes can sometimes bite.

bod150130

1-30-15

This cartoon was created with a difficult decision: Draw something in his dream or leave it blank (white)? Obviously, I opted for leaving it empty (I’m talking about the thought bubble, by the way). So, I guess that means he has empty dreams, too. Poor Jimmy is looking at a bleak future.

Well, that’s another week-in -review of my cartoons.

AS a bonus this week, I thought I’d also add three of the newest Technically Speaking comics as well from the week. No, I won’t leave commentary on those. It’s just a special “preview” if you haven’t been to the site yet. Right now, T.S. runs three times per week (Monday, Wednesday and Friday).

So…here they are. Please don’t be offended by my filthy digital friends.

Spoke too Soon

Sexting

Coffee Talk

Read more Technically Speaking HERE

Bad Habit

29 Jan

With a big chunk of my content/comics online, I have a bad habit of doing something. What exactly? Checking stats.

I had this problem many years ago when I first started adding things to the internet. I would toil over checking out Google Analytic, “likes” on Facebook and comments on my sites. Honestly, it was probably hours that I killed on a per day/couple of days basis. Nuts, right?

I slowly weened myself out of that bad habit.

Now, with the launch of my newest cartoon drama, Technically Speaking, I’ve noticed I kind of got back into it. It’s gross, I know.

My bad habit is sometimes I feel like I have to have admiration presented toward my work in this way (stats) when in reality Google Analytic, “likes” and comments don’t have much to do with anything. Sure, they all matter in the BIG scheme of things a bit, but not totally either. Just because something doesn’t get a million views doesn’t mean it’s not successful. With even one view a cartoon can be a success. How? Well, because success can come down the road for any post/cartoon. There might not be many views because the audience that its marketed toward might not be getting the memo that there is even new content available. Or people that get the memo honestly might not be into it where if the memo were delivered elsewhere they would. Stuff like that.

I’ve had a couple of hundred of views per comic at Technically Speaking since launching on Jan. 15th. I’m happy with that. In fact, it’s more than I expected considering this is new and all. But still, I notice that I’ve been straining my eyes still looking at stats.

Why?

Again, I think it’s a form of validation for me or something. “Oh, look – a “like”! This comic is going places now!” I know this mindset is a false belief yet my brain falls for it every time. Silly brain.

A big vice of mine is Reddit. My god, I spend so much time seeing what comics get up-voted or down voted. I do that here and also with my syndicated series, Break of Day.

index

Reddit, though I’ve been using it for years, I still have no clue what will be popular.

Some of my most viral comics that get shared in the tens-of-thousands (sometimes millions) on social media like Facebook, Twitter, etc. have been down-voted on Reddit. (If you don’t know about their system, people vote on whether they like content or not. If they like it, they up-vote it. If they don’t, they down-vote it. If something is up-voted a lot, it gets a lot of views and goes to the top of the page. Down-voted stuff generally falls into the Reddit abyss – never to be seen again.)

And even though I know Reddit is not a determining factor if something is good in general, I STILL mentally beat myself up about it if a comic is down-voted. “It’s trash. My stuff must just not jive with anyone. I should just quit now.” Okay, I don’t get THAT down about it, but still….crazy nonsense does fill my head.

Anyway, part of the bad habit is when I post on Reddit I enjoy sitting on my chair, eating popcorn and watching Google Analytic go nuts with visitors. It usually does. But then, if down-votes start coming in, well, those high numbers quickly go back to zero. I usually then throw-out the popcorn and go sob for a moment or two.

So, I’m going to try to get back into my ‘not-give-a-shit’ phase like I was before launching. After all, these little things don’t mean that much. Sure, I want an audience, “likes”, visitors, up-votes, etc. But, the main thing is I create content that I’M happy with. And I’m extremely happy with all my work. And quite frankly, most of it has been pretty successful in the long-run. Yes, I’ve had those disparaging major failures as well, but none of those were determined by “likes” and stuff. In fact, a lot of the things I’d consider a failure were actually pretty popular in some mediums. This whole social media thing, again, doesn’t mean much in the big scheme of things.

It’s important that I get back into my N.G.A.S phase because it really eats up a lot of time, thoughts and energy. It’s not worth it. My advice to you, if you post things online, is not to look too much into any of that stuff. I have cartoons that are selling good to publishers that get no “likes” when posted on Facebook. I have blogs with numerous comments and emails about how good it was that have been down-voted on Reddit. And there are numerous other examples. The opposite of these examples is true as well (like I’ll have a popular cartoon on Facebook available for purchase, yet, no sales).

Sure, I’ll probably post this blog to Reddit. But, I am determined to NOT check and see if it’s popular (well, only once or so).

I have to live by my old motto: Don’t check stats, check yourself.

By doing that, it’s like giving myself and my work an up-vote instead of letting someone else determine it.

Another Tragedy

23 Jan

I haven’t said much yet about the Charlie Hebdo situation that occurred in Paris recently. The main reason I haven’t spoke up much is because just about every other cartoonist out there has. I think all has been said.

Obviously, it was a tragedy and no one should be killed for creating a cartoon – no matter how insulting it is. But, I won’t get into that.

A talking point that this whole situation has also brought up is the publishing of cartoons.

Ted Rall has a great blog post recently basically about how here in America, there are practically ZERO staffed cartoonist on the payroll in our publications.

It amazes me how effective and important cartoons are and the impact they can have on society – yet – in almost all publications, the cartoonist are usually the first to go when lay-offs or downsizing occurs.

I’m not a political cartoonist, but this applies to the effectiveness of ALL cartoons. Think about the last time you saw a cartoon on a website, magazine, news feed, etc. and DIDN’T read it. Yes, they (cartoons) stick out. It’s one of the main reasons I’ve wanted to be a cartoonist ever since my first box of crayons around age two or so.

Also, cartoons are shared. Articles with just print typically aren’t. So, it’s a great marketing tool for publications to use cartoons. But…..again, they’re not taken seriously as a medium. It makes no sense. Cartoons are basically advertising for publications along with being also insightful (and usually funny).

And when it comes to PAYING cartoonist, well, that’s another area where many publications just steal work or feel they owe a cartoonist nothing. I’ve been approached numerous times to do work for “exposure” but no pay. Yeah, that makes it easy to pay bills as a professional. If ANYTHING, publications should pay their cartoonist more or equal to the writers, editors, etc. And hire more cartoonist.

At any rate, I wish this whole tragedy never happened, however, I hope it opens up the eyes of publications, people and the world about the importance of cartoons. Though sometimes (like in the case of Charlie Hebdo) they have a negative impact on some people, they also can have a positive impact as well. It doesn’t really matter. They’re great talking points.

But….there might be hope.  Things have a way of coming back full-circle, so let’s see if comics become the relevant media it once was.

Now THAT wouldn’t be tragic.

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